2002-06-21 - 2:15 p.m.
Friends don�t let friends Rice�
Eh�you ask, WTF does that mean?
Heheh�Today you will learn about a sub-culture in the, what would they be called? If I am Generation X, would they be Gen Next? We call em Rice boys. No this is not some derogative stereo type directed at Asians, it is a derogative stereotype directed at a type of car, and the boys (and girls) that own them.
So you ask�WTF are you taking about�you still have not explained anything.
A Rice-Boy can easily be picked out by his car. Most Ricers (the car) are imports from Japan, you know Hondas, Nissans, Toyo�s, and the like (Keep in mind, there are plenty of other types of cars that get Riced out. There are a fair share of 5.0 and 4.6 Mustangs, Neons, Z-28 Cameros, BMW�s etc. but or the most part, it is the Japanese cars that are the victims). No this does not mean that if you own one of these fine vehicles you are a Rice-Boy. In order to get that coveted title you must then begin to modify you car. So what you get are Civics (by far the most popular car to mod) that were once used by your mom to get to the store and back, now being turned into the fabled 10 sec. Car (now don�t get me wrong, it is possible to do this, but it is a lot of work, and lets not talk cost�)
Now granted, my SHO is heavily modified, so does that make me a Rice-boy? No and this is why. Most modifications done by the �Rice-Boy� do not actually increase the performance of his car by any significant amount, What they do try to accomplish is giving their car the appearance of high-performance. Unfortunately many Rice-Boys don�t seem to realize is that many of the things they do to their cars to make them faster actually hurt their performance. How you ask? Well let me elaborate.
Rice-boys tend to do things in extremes in the name of appearance, without thinking about the effects of such mods on the car. For example many fellahs put aftermarket rims with the wrong wheel offset on their car in the name of good looks. This can and often will lead to camber problems (the tilt of the wheel in relation to the road). These Rice-Boys also like to add giant wings their cars that create a fair amount of drag, thus lowering the performance of the car. These fellahs also like to play with the camber of their suspension/wheels. The problem is tha this angle change reduces the contact area of the tire with the ground (as well as wearing out the tire quickly). This then leads reduced braking ability, less tire contact in turns, thus reduced traction, etc...Sure, the car looks nice, but these mods are self defeating.
It would seem that the main goal of the Rice-Boys is to make their cars look fast. In fact that seems to be the driving force behind most of these cars. These fellahs add decals all over their cars claiming modifications that they havet yet to do(NOS for example). They also try to spice up their car's apperance with the addition of performance badges like V-Tech, Type-R, and even Spyder (sigh, which means no roof�not some type of hard core performance thing). Unfortunately many Rice-Boys seem to get mixed up when adding stickers to their cars. Often times there is conflicting info. For example, a V-Tech sticker on a car that also has a Type-R sticker on it(V-Tech is Honda, while Type-R is and Acura�) Sigh�Poor cars�they don�t even know what they are. Other rampant stickers include Japanese characters, assorted racing stripes, color splashes,
�sponsor� decals, and the like.
Now of course after you get the stickers on, it is time to start modifying the performance of the car. Most common sights are the Airplane wing attached to the rear deck and the ever-famous Fart Can muffler (a guaranteed 500hp gain doncha know�). Following that are the claims of NOS, turbos, superchargers, fuel rails, high flow air boxes, ram air�you get the picture. The problem is that all of these mods are under hood where a person can�t see them. Of course you would think you would see the performance of the car increase�but often you don�t. Remember it is more important to make folks think you have a hot car�
After the mechanical mods are done it is time to adjust the physical appearance of the car. Body effects, new side skirts, front and rear bumpers, extra lights and the like. Now granted I must give props to the fellahs who actually do the body mods�for the most part they are creative and well done. A little over the top�but well done. Also new rims, often 4 sizes larger that stock, and a lowering kit is put on.
Now that the outside is completed the Rice-Boy will often begin to tear out portions of his interior, to drop weight of course. Remember every ounce counts in the � mile time. Unfortunately and often unrealized by the Rice-boy pulling interior components only to replace them with lots of flash loud stereo equipment defeats the purpose of trying to shed weight. But as we all know, a loud will getcha at least 200hp�
Well I guess that this rant is long enuff. That and I have been plum wore out by my class. I have had 8 year olds that followed instructions better�and 6 year olds that could trouble shoot their own problems better. Sigh�I love teaching�but not helpless non-direction following folks who are just looking for something to do�
So After all this jabber about Ricers and Rice-Boys, I went out the internet to find you an example of a riced out car�and low and behold I found a good one with a great write up to go with it. SO for your viewing pleasure�here is the Riced Honda CRX�Enjoy Jason�
(I will provide site info upon request)
Welcome to the first new hall of shame of the millenium!! It's kind of short, but sweet, mostly centered around one car, but it really does deserve a hall of shame all it's own! This CRX was found by an associate in the bay area of California, thanks for sending this in!
Let me count the ways...
Here we see a CRX, in yellow (which we all know is the color of every serious race car), with an interesting, but highly stylish pinstriping job. But what really jumps out are the side skirts made of sheet metal, adding an enormous amount of aerodynamic efficiency at a minimum of added weight. It also provides much-needed sticker space for the all important "Powered By Honda" sticker, to clear up any confusion in case you thought that bumble bee sound was coming from an American V8. But if you weren't intimidated by the powered by Honda warning, perhaps the speeding fireball sticker will convince you that this car is indeed as fast as a speeding fireball. But not just any speeding fireball -- a closer inspection of the front fender reveals a fake "Integra Type-R" badge... could this be another identity crisis?
The truth is out there...
Trust no one. Or at least, trust yourself. Trust yoruself to never be as tacky as this guy. Here we see yet another example of home-made body kit action, complete with slick, visible bolts holding the skirt on every three inches or so. The cutouts make room for the dual, non-matching 4" exhaust tips, which help to expell the massive amounts of exhaust gas that the CRX's ground-pounding, sub 2.0 liter engine produces.
TRD Power
Did I mention an identity crisis? How about that big Toyota Racing Development banner? No wonder he needed the "Powered By Honda" on the side. His banner might have fooled you into thinking he swapped in a twin-turbo Supra engine in there (yeah right). Maybe he got that hood scoop for... I don't know what. And here we see a continuation of that very stylish application of pinstriping. And let's not forget to put another Integra Type-R sticker near the headlight, in case you missed the badge that was on the side fender, about 14 inches away.
Mad (simulated) stopping powazzz
Of course, every well-rounded performance car has added stopping power to go with their added power production, which makes it completely appropriate that the owner of this CRX has simulated additional stopping power for his simulated additional power from the engine. Rather than let anyone see his tiny drum brakes, this person decided to install some fake cross drilled brake rotors to complete his simulated-performance package.
So I guess that today you learned about Riced cars... I promise no more car posts for a while...
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